Welcome to Doomsday Week. Yes, gentlemen....gird your loins.....Valentines Day is Thursday (dun-dun-DUUUUUNNN).
Does anyone remember candy-grams? I went to St. Hubert's High School for Girls where there used to be a Valentine's Candy Gram exchange between our school and our brother school Father Judge. You would pay $1 and you would get to send a little card and a short rolling digital message that was displayed in the cafeteria to your boy/girl of choice at the opposite school. Never in your life have you witnessed several hundred teenage girls sitting in rapt attention and deathly silence broken only by a muffled giggle or a chorus of "awwwww's" at a particularly mushy message. In retrospect, they probably also should have just dropped a bottle of Drakkar Noir and a bag of jock straps and dirty socks in the middle of the cafeteria to add to the general Father Judge ambiance. Of course, being teenage girls, your relationship either lived or died by those messages; there were either squeals of joy or dramatic tears because "Bobby didn't send me a message! It's soooooo over!!"
Raise your hand if you're getting pregnant this weekend!! |
So are you ready for V-Day? It was a rhetorical question...I know you aren't. So here's some ideas to inspire you!
Get to Torresdale Flowers and pick out the biggest damn bouquet you've ever seen. Like basically the delivery guy should have to go out on disability because the flowers you bought were so freaking heavy he slipped a disc carrying them to your front door. If you place an order to be delivered on February 11th or 12th, you will receive $10.00 off a purchase of $50.00 or more! If you place an order to be delivered on February 13th, we will include a free Happy Valentine's Day mylar balloon with your arrangement! Call or stop in to see Antoniette in person today to place your orders!
Torresdale Flowers
7332 Frankford Ave
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 19136
www.torresdaleflowers.com
7332 Frankford Ave
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 19136
www.torresdaleflowers.com
Has your love run cold recently? It's probably because your windows suck. Take advantage of this February Special from Gallagher Brothers Windows by clicking on the link below and heat up your house and your love life.
Indoor Heat Wave
We're calling Gallagher brothers....we need new windows and a bigger friggin' door..... |
You or your significant other have always had the burning desire to make beautiful art, right? Well, now here's your chance....the gift of art lessons right here in Mayfair. Read more about it here: Art Lessons at Headquarters.
Your mother and I want to pose for you..... |
Go to the Grey Lodge Pub for dinner or just general good times. Pick a day of the week. Any day of the week this week and you'll pretty much find something going on at the GLP. Let's take a look:
Monday
It's Monday...just go get a drink and some cheesesteak eggrolls. No reason....it's just Monday.
Tuesday
5pm--Taco Tuesday--who doesn't love taco's? You're mother-in-law that's who...and what the hell does she know? Nothing. Go stuff your face.
No mother, I would never serve Johnny tacos. He hates them. Don't you dear? |
Wednesday
8pm--Quizzo. 2nd Floor. Who loves ya, baby??
Thursday
It's V-D Day (you know what I mean!). It's today and you got the flowers and all that other crap that girls eat up and now she expects to be wined and dined. GLP still has your back. A four course dinner special for just $25! And chocolate beers on tap. Chicks love chocolate and beer makes them do crazy-stupid things.
Friday
Who doesn't like foreplay in a bar?? I mean FOURplay. Sorry. Didn't mean to get you all excited. It's Stoudts Fourplay IPA International Debut from 6pm – 9pm! Stoudts debuts their new IPA, Fourplay IPA. It's a four part series that uses the same malt, but a different single hop in each of the four releases. This one, Batch # 1, will use Apollo hops. All four Fourplay IPAs will be 6% ABV and 60 IBUs. To further make it a fourplay, we will have 3 other Stoudts beers on tap too. For extra Fourplay (foreplay?) fun, play Connect Four against Kevin Romer for prizes. Clothing optional. Yoda mask essential.
Aaaaaand if all else fails do this:
Just slap on some Drakkar Noir and I. AM. READY. |
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