Monday, June 18, 2012

This Week in Mayfair (06/18/12)

So last week I lived up to my name and was M.I.A. I got caught up in a tornado of crazy last week and by the time I realized it, it was Wednesday and I hadn't done "This Week in Mayfair". I know, minions, I know...hush now...I'm back. I know you were a ball of confusion and butthurt last week because you didn't know what was going on and you wondered if the world was truly coming to an end like the muthaeffin Mayans predicted. It's all good in the hood. Mama's back. Truth: I was in rehab! Squeaky clean sober as La Lohan!! Holla!!

Unfortunately for me and my new-found sobriety, I will have to avoid locations like the Grey Lodge Pub and their Wednesday night Quizzo from 8-10. This makes me very sad....very sad. I am no longer able to publicly crow about my blinding brilliance and wear my "Vat of Useless Information" t-shirt. I will however, make myself available for you to call me as a Quizzo life-line while I sit on my couch thumbing my prayer beads and chain-smoking Camels unfiltered. Also you MUST bring me duck spring rolls and sweet potato fries. These are my terms. Accept or get pwned by that group of nerds at the next table who brave real social interaction by interrupting their Everquest raids to crawl out of their mom's basement and hiss at any remaining daylight on Wednesdays.

Good news! I can still go to Phillies games because God knows there's no beer or temptation there....oh wait...Demon liquor is everywhere!!

Well, I guess that just increases your odds of winning Mike Perzel and the Perzel Agency's Phillies ticket giveaway. Get a quote on your personal insurance (Auto, Home, Renters, Life) to be entered to win seats (Section 131, Row 5--game to be determined) at The Perzel Agency. While there, don't forget your $5.00 Wawa Gift Card. Just make sure you mention the MBA! All MBA members also qualify for a $25.00 Amazon Gift Card for getting a quote on your Business Insurance. No Purchase Necessary must be 18 years or older.

I can go enjoy music at the Pennypack  Park Music Festival because there's no beer or temptation there either. Pffffffff.....HAHAHAHAHAHA! Couldn't keep a straight face. Alright, I guess I'll have to listen to the Beatles Tribute, Revolve and 2U, a U2 tribute band with my car window down and a red solo cup full of water somewhere around the Welsh Road bridge by Judge.

I'm left with no other choice then to go haunt my local support groups like Marla Singer.

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